Unpacking My Brain

I am so very tired tonight. Five days of family activities, most of those nights short on sleep, a morning of making breakfast followed by scouring the cabin to remove all signs of human habitation. Oh, and then a four hour road trip to get home. About an hour after I got here my brain went out of gear and instead of unpacking and organizing, I just stopped. Fortunately I am familiar enough with exhaustion to not believe much of what my brain tells me. The various fears, anxieties, and despairs are mirages that will vanish in the morning. If there is any piece of it that does not vanish, there is plenty of time to handle it later.

The drive home was mostly quiet. We did get to drive through an impressive deluge, which managed to slough away the coating of mud that our van acquired by driving through a muddy deluge on the day we arrived. The entire weekend had intermittent rain. It was lovely though hard to appreciate on Saturday morning when the activity plans had to be adjusted because of the rain. One of the things that I noticed on the drive home was how interconnected all the highways and freeways are. It makes sense. They’re supposed to connect, but the third time I passed a sign indicating that I could turn there to reach Capitol Reef National Park, I really had a sense that the highways are a giant grid laid across the land and there are a dozen ways to get anywhere. Driving on the smaller highways was fun. It made me want to take more trips.

Tomorrow I will sleep until I am done sleeping. Then I will try to find enough focus to get work done. I have mailing to do and a back yard breakfast I’m helping host on Saturday.