Thinking on LTUE

The most wonderful and difficult thing about LTUE is that I get to have many emotional conversations which are necessarily brief. Sometimes a person will come to me with a problem that I may be able to answer and I have a few moments to give the best answer I can. Other times they come to me with thanks and a story about how something I did affected them. Or it may be a friend whom I haven’t seen in a long time and we have years of stories to share. Each of these conversations is worthy of an hour. Part of me wants sit with the person and ask about their lives, listen to their struggles, hear as they sort out answers. The convention does not allow for that. All the conversations are interrupted by schedule or by other conversations. So I get snippets. A string of shining moments, or hard moments, that I try to remember. Often I’m left with the ghost of words not said lingering in my mind. I can always think of something I wish I’d said better or something I forgot to say.

This year was more emotional than usual. I had a couple of dear friends who arrived at the show still in the shock portion of a major life upheaval. I had a panel turn into a solo presentation on a day’s notice and it went really well. My scheduled solo presentation went fine, but I can see a dozen ways I could have done it better. Perhaps someday I’ll get that chance. I got to laugh out loud many times. I had a few spaces with longer less interrupted conversations. And I had the moments when I was tired and worn, wishing for a place to hide so that my face could be tired without someone commenting on it or trying to cheer me up. I had my palm read and numerology math done on my birth date, both of which were fascinating. I’ll definitely take this year over the year I arrived at LTUE so emotionally distressed I could hardly remember how to run a booth. This was a really good event and I’m glad to have had it.