I turn forty-nine in less than a week. At one point last year I was looking ahead to my birthday and thinking how I could claim it. I wondered if there were a way to turn the day toward some lovely and celebratory purpose. I have a long habit of being uncomfortable stepping up into spotlights, of not fully claiming my accomplishments and expertise. I thought to use my birthday as a way to practice celebrating myself. Unfortunately I did not take the time back then to build any structure around the idea. There is no chute to funnel me inexorably into it rather than shying away. Also, I am full up on creative efforts just now. All of my days are filled with projects in process. Creating a celebration around my birthday sounds like another project and, in order to pull it off, one of my other projects would have to sit idle. So I’m likely to let the birthday pass quietly. Perhaps I’ll build structure around celebrating when I turn 50 next year.
January has been a month of heads-down work. I’ve made progress on House in the Hollow, I’ve crafted, I’ve put in time as a driving instructor for young adults, and I’ve spent large portions of most days on XDM2e. All of which seems like a good use for January. In the past week I’ve started laying ground work for events happening in late summer and fall. These are plans built on returning to events in person, which I am both excited and nervous about doing. But I don’t have to make those decisions today. Today I get to continue focusing tightly on the work in front of me to see how much I can get done before the end of February.