Yesterday staying focused on the positive took lots of conscious effort. Today, not so much. Perhaps that is because today was a project focused day where I tuned out everything except what was right in front of me. The noise turns off when I’m hyper-focused on a project. This was the first hyper focused day I’ve had in a long time and I re-surfaced with lots of work done. There was also a long list of things that I did not do today. I’ll look at that list tomorrow because I’m worn out this evening and would rather dwell in a feeling of accomplishment than of failure. I guess maybe that is the hard part, learning to be glad without qualifying it or tempering it. The other hard part is staring at the chocolate brownies on my kitchen counter and not eating them because I’ve finally realized that chocolate is like jet fuel for my anxiety. And, at least today, I want to not be anxious more than I want to eat chocolate. The scales may tip the other way on a different day.
After all-day layout, Gleek’s horseback riding lessons, Patch’s cub scout dinner, and all the other things. I’m tired now. Early bedtimes for all.