Regular perusers of my journal will by now have realized that Gleek has entered a challenging phase. “Challenging” is being used as a verb not an adjective. She is challenging my authority. She is challenging the family rules. She is trying to see how far rules can be made to bend to suit her whims.
Today she told me an outright lie. She and her friend asked for a marker. I told them “No” since the last three times they’d had a marker it had resulted in massive amounts of body art on Gleek, recoloring the playset purple, and coloring the neighbor’s toddler’s ears completely purple and yellow. Yes, the entire ear, on both ears, one yellow, one purple. I don’t get it either. No more markers for these two. A very short time after my refusal to provide a marker, Gleek and her friend announced their intention to return to his house. Gleek announced this by saying “I’m going to M’s house! I don’t have a marker!” This made me very suspicious. I was even more suspicious when she didn’t want to let me get close to her. She had a marker concealed up her pants leg. I sent the friend home and told Gleek she couldn’t play with friends for the rest of the day.
She took the restriction pretty well. We found other things for her to do. Then when bedtime rolled around I left Gleek and Patches eating a snack while I went to the bathroom. When I returned they were gone. I called. I checked all the rooms. Twice. I called some more. I checked the front yard. I was ready to start knocking on neighbor’s doors. I wasn’t scared yet, but I was getting mad. Howard joined the search. He was the one who found them. In the family room. Hiding under blankets. and giggling.
Howard scolded them severely. This made Patches howl in fear. He isn’t used to getting scolded. The scolding seemed to bounce right off of Gleek. But it didn’t bounce off completely, because after all the scolding was over (I contributed some too,) the two of them curled up on the couch with me for snuggling and reassurance. Gleek informed me: “Daddy used his ultra voice.”
Indeed he did.
And unlike mine, Gleek’s daddy probably doesn’t use it as his default tone of voice when talking to his kids…
Rare use of The Voice makes The Voice far more useful…
At this point my father’s voice (at any volume) just sounds like an adult from those Peanuts cartoons…
And unlike mine, Gleek’s daddy probably doesn’t use it as his default tone of voice when talking to his kids…
Rare use of The Voice makes The Voice far more useful…
At this point my father’s voice (at any volume) just sounds like an adult from those Peanuts cartoons…
Don’t you worry that snuggling right after yelling undermines it?
(not at all meaning to judge or critique or anything, that’s a genuinely curious completely unloaded question.)
Don’t you worry that snuggling right after yelling undermines it?
(not at all meaning to judge or critique or anything, that’s a genuinely curious completely unloaded question.)
It was kind of like “good-cop, bad-cop.” There was no question about whether or not the two of them understood that “hiding from Mommy” was a game that would upset Daddy. Mommy was there to explain the lesson and offer comfort. Daddy was there as a visible reminder of how unpleasant it was to break this rule.
I went in to each of them about 15 minutes later and snuggled them. And it’s all okay this morning. They both still like me.
It was kind of like “good-cop, bad-cop.” There was no question about whether or not the two of them understood that “hiding from Mommy” was a game that would upset Daddy. Mommy was there to explain the lesson and offer comfort. Daddy was there as a visible reminder of how unpleasant it was to break this rule.
I went in to each of them about 15 minutes later and snuggled them. And it’s all okay this morning. They both still like me.
No, because I could see that the lesson was learned. Once the lesson is learned there is no point in maintaining the tension. Children need reassurance that thier parents still love them even when they’ve made wrong choices.
No, because I could see that the lesson was learned. Once the lesson is learned there is no point in maintaining the tension. Children need reassurance that thier parents still love them even when they’ve made wrong choices.
Color Wonder markers?
So far we’ve only had crayons, but my son is getting his first set of markers for his birthday, and we figured the Color Wonder stuff was good, since he can’t color on his sister with them (he tried with crayons, but it didn’t work).
I guess the whole ‘special paper’ is an annoying factor for the older kids, though. I just figure that I would rather buy the special paper every month to avoid the marker issue (he has come home rainbow after nursery, and getting it out of his button down shirts is not fun.)
Color Wonder markers?
So far we’ve only had crayons, but my son is getting his first set of markers for his birthday, and we figured the Color Wonder stuff was good, since he can’t color on his sister with them (he tried with crayons, but it didn’t work).
I guess the whole ‘special paper’ is an annoying factor for the older kids, though. I just figure that I would rather buy the special paper every month to avoid the marker issue (he has come home rainbow after nursery, and getting it out of his button down shirts is not fun.)
We’ve had color wonder markers before. The cost of the special paper is prohibitive considering how quickly my kids can go through paper. At home I just stick to washable markers and supervision. I save the color wonder markers for things like car trips or plane trips when I really have to keep the mess down.
We’ve had color wonder markers before. The cost of the special paper is prohibitive considering how quickly my kids can go through paper. At home I just stick to washable markers and supervision. I save the color wonder markers for things like car trips or plane trips when I really have to keep the mess down.
Yeah – I see a lot of families in my ward who let their kids have them during Sacrament meetings.
I guess since I only have one kid of drawing age, it won’t be too bad buying the paper…
*crosses fingers*
In the meantime, we use the chubby washable crayolas.
Yeah – I see a lot of families in my ward who let their kids have them during Sacrament meetings.
I guess since I only have one kid of drawing age, it won’t be too bad buying the paper…
*crosses fingers*
In the meantime, we use the chubby washable crayolas.
Lying vs. Just Joking
We are now learning about lying with SoccerGirl. She will lie to me about something and then I will find out soon after that she lied and I will have to say, “you told me you did this, but, I just found out you didn’t. THAT’S LYING!” she’ll say, “I was just joking…” and I’ll have to say, “NO, that is lying.”
sheesh.
I worry a little about it because she has such a stubborn and independent personality that I believe she will lie to me so that she can just do what she wants to do…
We have also talked about how if you do something wrong and immediately confess, instead of trying to hide what you did, we will be less angry.
One day, my kids soberly confessed to me that they played with water in the sink…
did you make a mess? no.
did you get water on the floor? no.
did you get yourselves all wet? no.
um, why are you two confessing again? 🙂
Lying vs. Just Joking
We are now learning about lying with SoccerGirl. She will lie to me about something and then I will find out soon after that she lied and I will have to say, “you told me you did this, but, I just found out you didn’t. THAT’S LYING!” she’ll say, “I was just joking…” and I’ll have to say, “NO, that is lying.”
sheesh.
I worry a little about it because she has such a stubborn and independent personality that I believe she will lie to me so that she can just do what she wants to do…
We have also talked about how if you do something wrong and immediately confess, instead of trying to hide what you did, we will be less angry.
One day, my kids soberly confessed to me that they played with water in the sink…
did you make a mess? no.
did you get water on the floor? no.
did you get yourselves all wet? no.
um, why are you two confessing again? 🙂