Paralysis planned away

Over the past week or more I’ve been experiencing an accumulation of guilt/negativity/self dislike. This accumulation peaked last night and this morning when it all spilled out in a conversation with Howard. The central theme of my rant was that I’m a bad person because I have this whole list of important things which simply aren’t getting done. Howard, wise man that he is, listened and hugged and nodded. Then when I’d wound down a little he asked: “So is this list written down?”

No. It isn’t. Bits of it are written in random places, but mostly I’ve been trying to task manage in my head. On a great day I can keep track of 10 or 20 objectives for the day in my head. But most days are just ordinary. On ordinary days I can keep track of 4-6 objectives, on bad days I can only track 1or 2 things. Everything below those top objectives completely falls out of my head until I have an external reminder. This means that important tasks get forgotten until they are critical or overdue. The key here is the external reminder. I need to write this stuff down so that I can check the list. In past times I have used a planner for this. Last year when money was so tight I decided not to buy more pages for it. It wasn’t a problem last year because the pace of life around here was much slower. I didn’t have as many variables to keep track of. That is not the case this Fall, and I have been slowly going crazy trying to keep all this stuff in my head.

Today Howard went and bought me pages for my old planner. I sat down and started all the repetitive writing necessary to set up a paper planner. I don’t like having to write “laundry” on every Tuesday and Friday page, but having the word there is an important trigger to make sure that it gets done. As I wrote I kept remembering small tasks that I want to have done. I wrote them all in a list. As the list got longer I felt calmer and calmer inside my head. All those tasks have been floating in the back of my brain yammering at me to do them. I couldn’t let them go or they would never get done. But once I write them, I can really let them go because I can always check the list to find out what they are.

Having a planner will not solve my problems. But it does let me sort them logically. For the first time in days, my head feels clear and I don’t feel paralyzed by the sheer weight of how many things need done.

16 thoughts on “Paralysis planned away”

  1. Good work. I’m glad you’re feeling back in control.

    One geek nit: planners on the computer are free (or effectively so) and things like repetitive tasks/appointments are just a few clicks instead of tons of writing.

    I’m sure you have your reasons for going paper, but I gave up my paper planner ten years ago and have never looked back.

  2. Good work. I’m glad you’re feeling back in control.

    One geek nit: planners on the computer are free (or effectively so) and things like repetitive tasks/appointments are just a few clicks instead of tons of writing.

    I’m sure you have your reasons for going paper, but I gave up my paper planner ten years ago and have never looked back.

  3. I set aside an lj entry that has the days of the week (no dates) and all the repetitive tasks written in. Then I copy and past for as far into the future as I need to and add dates. It’s on my favorites list and I check it every day. It is also on my favorites list at work so I can remember things at work that I need to do on the way home or things I need to do on the way to work the next day. That might be an alternative solution to your paper planner… or a supplement thereof.

  4. I set aside an lj entry that has the days of the week (no dates) and all the repetitive tasks written in. Then I copy and past for as far into the future as I need to and add dates. It’s on my favorites list and I check it every day. It is also on my favorites list at work so I can remember things at work that I need to do on the way home or things I need to do on the way to work the next day. That might be an alternative solution to your paper planner… or a supplement thereof.

  5. Cool!
    Howard’s a very sane guy. (Husbands are neat!) I’ve always found that when I use an organized planner, it’s enouraged me to get far more done on the positive side of my personal ledger than it cost (even with the $300 gadget).
    This week’s been driving me steadily further and further up a wall, with a couple of frightening, important items on the urgent to do list nipping at me. I should probably try to take your example.

  6. Cool!
    Howard’s a very sane guy. (Husbands are neat!) I’ve always found that when I use an organized planner, it’s enouraged me to get far more done on the positive side of my personal ledger than it cost (even with the $300 gadget).
    This week’s been driving me steadily further and further up a wall, with a couple of frightening, important items on the urgent to do list nipping at me. I should probably try to take your example.

  7. Time and CHaos is something I was exposed to YEARS ago (I’m talking like a decade or so), and it was very very nice… I’m gonna play with T&C 7, and see what it’s like… It’s 45 bucks for 2 years upgrades… I’ll let you know if it’s even close to worth it (You’ll know it is, because i’ll actually pay for a copy myself)… You can get a free trial of the full version from their website… maybe you too should try it?

    Anyways… I’m glad that the Wise One was able to help you find the answer you needed…

    Yet more reasons why I’m jelous of you two…

  8. Time and CHaos is something I was exposed to YEARS ago (I’m talking like a decade or so), and it was very very nice… I’m gonna play with T&C 7, and see what it’s like… It’s 45 bucks for 2 years upgrades… I’ll let you know if it’s even close to worth it (You’ll know it is, because i’ll actually pay for a copy myself)… You can get a free trial of the full version from their website… maybe you too should try it?

    Anyways… I’m glad that the Wise One was able to help you find the answer you needed…

    Yet more reasons why I’m jelous of you two…

  9. Wow… I never thought of list-writing as being calming — and I always wondered why Ann (my wife) did it so often.

    When I have an actual, physical, written-out list, I feel threatened by the enormity of it and the belief that I can never achieve it all. When I don’t have a list, I guess I function in a minor denial mode in which I can consider the tasks one at a time.

    Maybe the secret to chore-happiness in our household would be: Ann writes the list, doesn’t show it to me, and gives me assignments one at a time.

  10. Wow… I never thought of list-writing as being calming — and I always wondered why Ann (my wife) did it so often.

    When I have an actual, physical, written-out list, I feel threatened by the enormity of it and the belief that I can never achieve it all. When I don’t have a list, I guess I function in a minor denial mode in which I can consider the tasks one at a time.

    Maybe the secret to chore-happiness in our household would be: Ann writes the list, doesn’t show it to me, and gives me assignments one at a time.

  11. Ding ding ding – We have a winner!

    That is sooooooooooo true of why I write lists.

    I get super overwhelmed by thoughts floating in my head, and I know I will be super annoyed with myself when I forget something that needs to be done.

    I don’t like that nagging feeling taht there are things that I need to attend to but that I can’t remember.

    I’m glad that Howard is helping you in your endeavor!

  12. Ding ding ding – We have a winner!

    That is sooooooooooo true of why I write lists.

    I get super overwhelmed by thoughts floating in my head, and I know I will be super annoyed with myself when I forget something that needs to be done.

    I don’t like that nagging feeling taht there are things that I need to attend to but that I can’t remember.

    I’m glad that Howard is helping you in your endeavor!

  13. Right now I don’t want to have to figure out any more electronic systems. I’m spending lots of brainspace trying to configure a store and prepare for shipping, so I really needed to just revert to a familiar system rather than learn a new one.

    Eventually my task planning will be via an electronic medium, but not right now.

  14. Right now I don’t want to have to figure out any more electronic systems. I’m spending lots of brainspace trying to configure a store and prepare for shipping, so I really needed to just revert to a familiar system rather than learn a new one.

    Eventually my task planning will be via an electronic medium, but not right now.

  15. Writing a list

    When I carry my “to do” list in my mind, I feel overwhelmed and run the risk of dropping critical items.

    When I start making a list, it grows longer and longer but when I am done, I go back and star the truly important things to start with. I can often see that I have put enough items on today’s list to last me a week. After finishing my list and experiencing a moment of “overwhelmed”, I then postpone non-crucial items and come up with a more realist plan for the day and I am able to end the day feeling positive. It is positive because I can see what I accomplished. Without a list, I end up in the evening feeling discouraged because all I can focus on is the multitude of things I didn’t get done.

  16. Writing a list

    When I carry my “to do” list in my mind, I feel overwhelmed and run the risk of dropping critical items.

    When I start making a list, it grows longer and longer but when I am done, I go back and star the truly important things to start with. I can often see that I have put enough items on today’s list to last me a week. After finishing my list and experiencing a moment of “overwhelmed”, I then postpone non-crucial items and come up with a more realist plan for the day and I am able to end the day feeling positive. It is positive because I can see what I accomplished. Without a list, I end up in the evening feeling discouraged because all I can focus on is the multitude of things I didn’t get done.

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