Customer Support

The email arrives in the Schlockmercenary box. It addresses me politely, but firmly to inform me that there is a problem with the order they received (or sometimes, failed to receive.) I used to worry about these emails. I fretted that the customers were really frustrated/angry/disappointed because of my mistake. I don’t worry so much anymore because I’ve answered enough that I know how the rest of the exchange is likely to go.

I write back, apologizing for the error and telling them what I’m going to do to correct it. Usually it just means I quickly ship out a replacement for the missing/damaged item. The apology email and shipping are really not much trouble for me. The responses I get are delightful. All the formality and firmness vanish. The customer is always surprised at how simple solving the problem was for them and I usually try to solve the problem in a way that lets the customer feel like they benefited from my mistake. They feel good. I feel good. The cost is minimal and so everybody wins.

Our customer service policies do make it easy for someone to take advantage of us. That has probably already happened. But I don’t believe it has happened often. Most people are honest and good. I don’t want to punish all the nice people by treating them with suspicion. Besides, buying stuff on the internet is scary enough. We want people to know that if something goes wrong, we’ll make it right.