Head cold and heartsick

Still sick today. I got some work done, but there was napping. More napping than work. At least I’m lucky enough to have a great business partner. Howard kept telling me to stop working and go lie down.

Then in the afternoon Link and I had a conversation in which he told me he feels stupid. He feels like everyone else learns things in great big leaps and all he can do is take little steps. He feels like he is stupid in spelling and reading. He feels like the other kids do not like him because of all this. My heart aches for his judgment of himself, but I can’t deny his observations. It does not help that he is coming down with the same cold that knocked me, Howard, and Kiki flat. We have a 5 day weekend coming. I have to give some thought about what must be done after that. I have to be able to do something to help Link.

9 thoughts on “Head cold and heartsick”

  1. Goose, 13, female, tends to have the same sort of reaction. What has helped her understand is that some people have incredible leaps of understanding that bypass all those little steps but that most people take all those little steps and some take them faster than others. She grasps science concepts in those leaps. She grasps some math concepts in quick little steps. She takes a long time to take the little steps when talking about grammar.

  2. I know this sounds kind of simple and cliche, but have you told him the story of the Tortoise and the Hare? Because it sounds like even though Link doesn’t learn things in these enormous bursts, he really does keep learning constantly.

    As a late bloomer myself, I remember that story having huge meaning for me back when I was his age.

  3. Link does make leaps for some things, but most of his leaps are perpendicular to school curriculum. One thing that is particularly hard is that he has a little sister who reads faster than he does.

  4. Ayup. It is a major problem when a younger sibling does something better than an older one. And the older one really doesn’t care that there is so much more that they can do better/faster than the younger one and generally get grumpy at you for pointing out all those things.

    (I’m really guilty on that count. My eldest sister graduated from school a year early. Our middle sister graduated from school with a year of college credit. I graduated from school a year early with a year of college credit. (I say school because Ridgecroft was K-12 and we all started kindergarten there and attended until graduation from high school.))

  5. I love Howard Gardner’s theory of multiple intelligences, because it describes different ways of being smart. It is frustrating that most people only count “school smart.” I’ve had good success with kids who are not “school smart” by explaining this theory to them, (there might be some kid friendly resources on the web) and helping them see what types of intelligence they have.

  6. Sandra, I don’t know if this quote will help Link, but it might help you.

    It’s one that my Mom has used and passed along several times.

    “All children are gifted. Some just open their package sooner than others.”

    I think Link is still on the journey to opening his gift. Maybe that will appeal to the Indiana Jones inside of him.

  7. One of the difficulties come in when everyone devalues the way that Link is smart. He is very smart at video games and the world is full of messages that video games are not a worthwhile pursuit. Link is very tender and snuggly, but those are things that an 11 year old boy is not supposed to be.

    I need to look up Gardner’s theory and see if there are intelligences that I can show Link he has. Hopefully ones that are not societally devalued.

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